Show key events only

Please turn on JavaScript to use this feature

Before we go any further, get into this. It’s the final over and it’s an arse-nipper.

What is is about football that incites antipathy? It’s not enough to love yourself; rather that sensation must necessarily be juxtaposed against who you hate, identity a representation of who you aren’t almost as much as who you are.

Which is one reason why clubs who can’t rely on geography to deliver them a natural rival find another way – Brighton and Crystal Palace, for example, battling for supremacy of the much-coveted M23 corridor. Of course, there’s a pretext – some mid-70s competition between teams who’d previously not played each other much, followed by mid-to-late 70s animus between their respective managers, Terry Venables and Alan Mullery, former teammates with incompatible egos. But as much as anything, this contest reflects the basic human desire to hate, the beautiful game much the richer for it.

And today’s edition offers plenty of scope for fun in that vein. Palace are on a dreadful...