In its infinite wisdom, BT has chosen to employ the services of one Robbie Savage as their expert analyst to educate us with his pearls of wisdom regarding the subtle nuances and tactical complexities of football.

Savage earned his reputation as an old fashioned hard man during his career by regularly stepping over the boundary between good play and foul play.

The aptly named Savage is an odious character who has been branded ‘the dirtiest player in Premier League history’

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-539649/REVEALED-The-dirtiest-player-Premier-League-history.html

His trophy cabinet boasts an impressive 87 yellow cards – 5 more than the incumbent of second place, that other gift to humanity, Lee Bowyer.

All of this of course makes Savage the perfect recruit for BT. The once respected national telecoms institution has been sold to the highest bidders and with it, lost its integrity along the way.

This brings me to Savage’s commentary on the match between Brighton and Arsenal last Sunday. Savage had been spouting his usual dinosaur drivel throughout the game, but really stepped it up a notch when our rookie striker Chuba Akpom came on in the 70^th minute.

Chuba is an exciting prospect from our academy. At 19, he’s a strong,...