A shiny new signing arrives at the Emirates. €2m for a January to May loan deal. Same amount as we paid for the whole of Rob Holding.

I read of his signing on the BBC website – many were complaining that the BBC had duped them into thinking that it was the Biter we had signed. There are some very, very stupid people out there.

No, we have signed a 25 y.o Spaniard, named Denis Suarez Fernandez. Denis started his career at Celta Vigo and was signed by Man City as a 17 y.o. During his two years at The Northern Oilers he was voted Man City Youth Player of the Year, then Barcelona called. A short loan at Sevilla before Barca sold him to Villareal with a buy back clause which they activated. After 43 games for Barca he has arrived at a proper club – The Arsenal.

Essentially we have signed a Journeyman. Just turned 25 and on his 6th club.

We have a fine history of Spanish players – Cesc, Nacho, Santi, Reyes, Arteta, Catwalk – if he hits their heights we have got a bargain but why Suarez?

Another...